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Jan 30, 2025

Hallmark Holidays and Winter Blues

Laney Sewell

Photography By

Special to CH2/CB2 Magazine (celebratehiltonhead)
But Love Actually Is All Around Us

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Happy Valentine’s Day! And Happy February 15th Candy Sale to all who celebrate! 

To be clear, whether single, married, divorced, and whatever political affiliation you’re rocking, the February 15th Candy Sale brings people together. It could even make Northerners smile and talk to each other in public (I can’t believe people don’t do that everywhere). 

We are a month into the New Year and things just keep getting weirder, plus I’m cold and the cold is a lot less beautiful and magical without Christmas decor everywhere. The constant rain also isn’t doing much for my outfit choices: boots, fur jackets, and wet hair don’t mix in any universe. 

Don’t get it twisted, though. I’ll be right here complaining about how June-September temperatures are hell on earth before we know it, even though late spring and summer here make these disgusting winters (if you can even call this “winter”) worth it. 

You see, I haven’t always been a fan of Valentine’s Day. It’s great when you’re 8 years old and fill a poorly decorated shoebox with sweet cards and treats from everyone in your class, great in college when it’s partnered with an excuse to buy a sparkly pink cocktail dress for a function (has to be new, Mom and Dad, because people will remember if I wear the same one from last year! That’s illegal. Also, Revolve has a new Valentine’s edit out!) and cheap wine, and even better after that when surrounded by the right person. 

I also am privy to a Galentine’s moment, with crispy Pinot Grigio, good charcuterie, and espresso martini nightcaps. 

Honorable mention goes to my parents who made every holiday magical, even when I had a horrifying, less-than-magical teenager attitude (which I still do sometimes, but that’s not the point). I love the flowers, chocolates, romantic gestures, and I really love those brownie batter donuts from Dunkin, but I will always acknowledge the fact that it’s just plain hard for a lot of people in a lot of different ways. 

See, we have all been 16 and heartbroken by someone that the thought of now is either hilarious or bone-chilling, and we have rolled our eyes at Valentine’s Day, referring to it as another “stupid holiday that Hallmark capitalizes on.” 

(Note to self: First of all, the word “capitalize”? You’ve taken one half-semester economics class from a guy who was just there to coach lacrosse and now you’re throwing that word around? You do nothing to stimulate the economy other than treating yourself at any minor inconvenience.) 

I have never deprived myself of anything. Ever. But it’s so valid to want to crawl in a hole and read romantic novels on your Kindle or cry at a Nicholas Sparks movie adaptation. 

Real talk: This season is hard. Just like the holidays are, but for completely different reasons. We as humans are such fragile and complicated beings that it’s almost impossible to grasp how togetherness is difficult for some, and time alone is difficult for others. 

In my personal relationships, I’ve watched the people I love face unimaginable things recently, and it makes me all the more thankful for my village and has thrown a wrench in my perspective. So, let’s take a minute here and talk about love, with your favorite unqualified, chronically online 22-year-old therapist! According to the Oxford dictionary, love is defined as “an intense feeling of deep affection.” “Intense.” That’s the word. 

If you’ve ever ridden in one of my Cyclebar classes and lived to tell the tale, I often say that “Nothing worth having is ever easy to get” and “Everything in life is hard; pick your hard.” Truly, everything about love is hard, and you have to pick your hard in that area as well. 

If you know me, you know there isn’t a phone call I hang up, a room I leave, or a day that I don’t tell my coworkers or riders at Cyclebar that I love them. “Thank you for being here, and if no one has told you yet today I love you and I’m proud of you” – every single time I get on that microphone for 45 minutes of cardio.

It’s so easy to say that you want to find love and be in love, but you will never get there until you learn to love yourself. Last month I briefly mentioned this when talking about New Year’s resolutions. Sure, you can lose weight and change your life, but it won’t matter or make you feel any different if you don’t believe in yourself during that process. Not to get crazy here, but “Love Actually” is a Christmas movie, and a phenomenal one at that, and the famous quote still rings true all these years later: “If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love actually is all around.” 

The key to getting through tricky times like Valentine’s Day is the pressure that your love for someone or something can only be expressed one day a year. That, my friends, could not be further than the truth. 

If you know me, you know there isn’t a phone call I hang up, a room I leave, or a day that I don’t tell my coworkers or riders at Cyclebar that I love them. “Thank you for being here, and if no one has told you yet today I love you and I’m proud of you” – every single time I get on that microphone for 45 minutes of cardio. I understand that “I love you” is a loaded phrase, and I get the magnitude of it, but life is so much more vibrant when you love your people and love them hard. 

So, my friends, get out there and spread the love! Sometimes it takes someone forcing you to get out of bed and get some fresh air to realize that we are all literally glorified houseplants. We’ve got to get some sun and escape our caves every once in a while. It truly makes all the difference.

I understand how hard things are right now, and I encourage you all to talk to someone when you need it, and understand that my ears are always open, even if you think it’s weird to have parasocial relationships. We listen and we do not judge. 

Happy Valentine’s Day, Candy Sale Day and all the things! I love you all! 

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