The Outward Mindset: an Alternative to Murder

Every morning after I’ve gotten my run in and taken care of whatever four-legged friends I’m nannying that week, I go about the process of getting ready for work. I generally use this drinking coffee, showering, applying makeup time to listen to … MURDER!

Yes, I have been addicted to Dateline podcasts about crime for more than a minute now. Maybe it’s Lester Holt’s soothing deep voice as he shares stories about the evil that lives in the heart of man. Who can say? Sometimes the podcast is still going as I get to work, and Hunter has to hear me shout at the phone in disbelief at the despicable human race and their hideous actions—mostly driven by greed, lust, and jealousy.

A few weeks ago, I was mindlessly scrolling through Tik Tok to find what new dance trends might be suitable for entertaining people with my mediocre skills, when I came across a young man talking about three books that would “make you the smartest person in the room.”

The books he mentioned were The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely, and Outwitting the Devil by Napoleon Hill. So, the next morning, instead of murder, I chose an audiobook. Having quickly made it through all three, I went on to another, which I think is much better than all three he mentioned.

The Outward Mindset: Seeing Beyond Ourselves by the Arbinger Institute is a book that will perhaps change the way you see others—and quite possibly change the way you see yourself.

Ultimately, it will help you to see how it is your actions that are creating your environment and not the actions of others. This book is a must-read for anyone in a position of leadership or looking to make positive changes in a family unit or within friendships. If there is one golden nugget I gleaned from this book, it is this: “Don’t wait for others to change. The most important move is to change your mindset regardless of whether others change theirs.”

As a Type A, get-things-done, cross t’s-and-dot i’s-quickly-and-efficiently personality, sometimes I fail to see the importance of just being still and connecting with people for a minute. There is an ongoing joke in our office about my love of quoting “Pierce-ism’s.” My mentor, Pierce Lowrey, loved sprinkling the office with inspirational business quotes. They were on walls, in our mailboxes, in handwritten notes. Some of my favorites are: “Is what I’m doing right now getting me to my goals?”; “Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.”; “It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows”; and “You never saw a fish on the wall with his mouth closed.”

But a light went on the other day as I was reading this book. What made Pierce Lowrey a great leader was not his quotes and inspirational statements. It was the way he connected with people—his customers, employees, and business associates. He genuinely cared about what was going on in your life, and when there was a problem, he wanted to help. At least once a week he would come into my office and ask if there was anything he could do to assist with whatever issues we were dealing with that week.

If you’re going to be a good leader, you must care about the people you lead and serve with your organization more than you care about yourself. And that is the most important thing in business.

We hope you enjoy our big Men in Business issue and learn a thing or two from some of these success stories.

Until next month! 

M.Washo

Publisher/ Editor-in-Chief