Sixteen years ago, Hilton Head mother Vanessa faced the unimaginable: losing a child to suicide. Out of her grief grew a mission that has not only honored her son’s memory but also saved countless lives across the Lowcountry. In 2009, Vanessa re-launched the Hilton Head-Bluffton chapter of the Out of the Darkness Walks, part of the nationwide effort led by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP).
“The mission of AFSP is simple yet powerful: to save lives and bring hope to those affected by suicide,” Vanessa said. “For me, it’s personal. I began the walk as a mother who lost her child. That pain will never go away, but creating this walk gives it purpose.”
What began as a small gathering has become a pillar of community support, awareness, and fundraising, bringing together survivors, advocates, families, and those struggling with personal issues in a shared journey toward healing.
On October 18, the Hilton Head community once again came together at Shelter Cove Community Park for the Out of the Darkness Walk. Hundreds joined in solidarity, carrying photographs of loved ones, pinning names to a memory board, and walking in teams clad in matching shirts. Some wore buttons with photos of those they’ve lost.
“Everyone should bring a picture of their loved one,” said Becky, who lost her son to suicide seven years ago. “It’s a way to keep their memory alive while showing that no one walks this path alone.”
The one-mile walk is far more than a symbolic gesture. It raises awareness, reduces stigma, and funds AFSP’s life-saving work. Donations remain open through the end of the year, ensuring that even those who couldn’t attend can still contribute to the cause.
A Crisis Close to Home
While suicide might seem like a distant tragedy, Vanessa stresses that it is very much a local issue.
“Last year alone, we had five or six suicides here on Hilton Head just in the month before the walk,” Becky said. “It doesn’t always make the news, but it’s happening – and that’s why this work matters.”
The statistics are sobering. In 2023, 49,316 Americans died by suicide. South Carolina accounted for 818 of those deaths, ranking 33rd nationally. “We can do better,” Vanessa said.
Equally troubling are the means. “Sixty-five percent of suicides involve firearms,” Vanessa said. “That number alone should tell us how urgent this issue is.”
The funds raised through the Out of the Darkness Walk support research, education, advocacy, and community programs. Some of the most impactful include:
• Talk Saves Lives: A 45-minute training available online or in-person that equips participants with the basics of suicide prevention.
• SafeTALK: A more in-depth, three-hour program teaching participants how to recognize warning signs and connect individuals to help.
• More Than Sad: A school-based program designed for high school students to recognize personal struggles and seek support.
“I’m trained to deliver both Talk Saves Lives and SafeTALK,” Vanessa said. “They give everyday people the tools to step in, ask the right questions, and possibly save a life.”
Know the Warning Signs: changes in behavior, mood, or talk, especially after a painful event, loss, or major life change—can signal risk. Watch for:
• Talking about wanting to die, feeling hopeless, or being a burden
• Withdrawing from family, friends, or activities
• Sleeping too much or too little
• Increased use of alcohol or drugs
• Searching for ways to end their life
• Giving away prized possessions
• Visiting or calling to say goodbye
• Extreme fatigue or loss of interest
• Sudden mood shifts: depression, anxiety, irritability, or anger
• Feelings of humiliation, shame, or unbearable pain
• Aggression or agitation
• A sudden sense of calm or relief after a dark period
If you notice these signs, don’t stay silent. Ask directly, listen with compassion, and connect them to help.
Local partnerships also play a key role. The South Carolina Department of Mental Health provides accessible counseling services, including Coastal Empire Mental Health in Hilton Head. National hotlines and online tools, like the 988 national Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, hope.connectsyou.org, and hope.connectsSCkids.org, connect individuals in South Carolina directly with trained counselors – sometimes within minutes.
For LGBTQ+ youth, resources like The Trevor Project offer specialized, life-saving support.
“Parents, teachers, and friends need to know where to turn,” Vanessa says. “These resources are there – we just need to spread the word.”
Perhaps the most important lesson Vanessa and Becky share is the courage to confront the uncomfortable by asking questions.
“It’s hard to look someone you love in the eye and ask, ‘Are you thinking about suicide?’” Vanessa said. “But you have to. A suicidal person will often tell you the truth. What’s dangerous is when we tiptoe around the subject.”
She recalls the regret of never directly asking her own son. “I know he would have told me,” she said softly. “That’s why I train others to do what I couldn’t.”
Warning signs can include verbal cues, social media posts, withdrawing from friends and family, or giving away prized possessions. “The most dangerous thing you can do is keep it a secret,” Vanessa said. “If someone tells you not to say anything, that’s exactly when you must.”
Beyond education and statistics, the Out of the Darkness Walk is about connection. For one afternoon each fall, the community unites in compassion and remembrance. Survivors share stories, neighbors extend support, and strangers become allies.
“The walk shows people they’re not alone,” Becky said. “When you see hundreds of people gathered – each carrying a face, a name, a memory – you realize how many lives are touched by suicide. It’s heartbreaking, but it’s also healing.”
This sense of solidarity ripples outward, breaking down the stigma that keeps too many from seeking help. “Every conversation, every sign posted, every training session – it all moves us closer to a world where suicide is no longer a leading cause of death,” Vanessa said.
Mike and Becky Christensen hold the banner during this year’s event on October 18 at Shelter Cove Community Park.
Looking Ahead
Though the October walk has ended, the work continues year-round. Donations continue to be accepted through December, and training programs are available for schools, workplaces, and faith communities. Local leaders are also working to expand the number of 988 signage installations across Hilton Head, ensuring that anyone in crisis knows help is just a call away.
“It doesn’t stop when the walk ends,” Vanessa said. “That’s just the beginning. Each dollar raised, each person trained, each resource shared – those are the victories we celebrate every day.”
“My hope is that one day, no mother, father, brother, sister, or friend will have to walk in our shoes,” Becky said. “Until then, we keep walking together.”
At its heart, the Out of the Darkness Walk is not about walking one mile on one afternoon. It’s about building a future where every life is valued, every voice is heard, and no one suffers in silence.
“Hope,” Vanessa said, “is what keeps us going.”
How to Help:
• Donate: Contributions are accepted through the end of the year at AFSP.org/HiltonHead.
• Get Trained: Explore Talk Saves Lives, SafeTALK, and More Than Sad programs at AFSP.org.
• Reach Out: If you or someone you know is struggling, call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
