I’ve always excelled at thinking a lot and analyzing. Holding a topic or thought in my head, studying it from all angles. Squeezing it and releasing it only slightly.
I want to know all the aspects. All the ins and outs. To truly understand. The possibilities are endless. I’m still not sure if that’s helpful or unhelpful – although I’ve mostly considered it creative.
I enjoy crafting stories about the most mundane situations by giving them a faux historical context or a little pizazz – going down “what if” rabbit holes until I was exhausted but never reaching the end of the tunnel. The process is great for story writing, not so great for other areas of life.
Growing up, I recall being told, in an exasperated tone, that I had an active imagination. My small child’s mind interpreted that to mean my imagination should remain hidden. So, I went underground, keeping all my creative thinking to myself. I pondered and mulled over my thoughts as asides to the many books I devoured.
It wasn’t until I was in graduate school that my therapist said something to the effect of “Whoa, you really do overthink,” or something like that. Lynn had a way with words – direct and to the point. I loved her for her bluntness. I also secretly craved the care of the more nurturing therapist down the hall.
By this time in my life, my overthinking was getting in the way.
My creative way of studying all my options or all sides of a situation left me feeling indecisive, stuck, and frustrated. I was the human version of the spinning ball on my computer screen.
Overthinking isn’t something new. About 73% of young adults and 52% of middle-aged adults overthink. Although it can be linked to depression, anxiety, and stress-related conditions, overthinking can also occur on its own. I recognize overthinking as a nervous system regulation mechanism – a way to try to gain control or predict an unknown. While some people can weave in and out of overthinking with expert precision, the rest of us just can’t.
There are many ways you can overthink. Think of it as an all-you-can-eat buffet. You can take a little of everything offered or only take your fill of one thing and usually come back for seconds.
Rumination
Rumination involves dwelling, but not on the “good stuff.” No, this is a revisiting of your perceived failures, of what you could’ve said or done differently, of past events, and of what you believe a situation says about you. Rumination keeps your mind fixed on distressing situations.
Analysis Paralysis
So many options. Analysis paralysis keeps you stuck circling, researching, and exploring all the options and then some. You may also be fearful of making a wrong decision. Fear usually leads to increased contemplation, which in turn leads to more spiraling and stuckness. Round and round you go, without actually getting anywhere. And the more you tell yourself you can’t make a decision or get started, the more you become absolutely correct.
Worry
Your mind is chock-full of worst-case scenarios, prepping, and planning for experiences or conversations you might never have. Worry excels at increasing anxiety, overthinking, and stress levels. Unfortunately, it’s not very good at predicting the future or resolving future-leaning concerns.
What Causes Overthinking?
It’s a combination of a few events, and honestly, it’s different for everyone. However, the answer that fits almost everyone is that overthinking is a protective strategy. It’s trying to keep you safe, albeit in a backhanded compliment kind of way.
Overthinking is associated with heightened activity in the brain’s threat-detection areas and networks. When these areas are activated, your nervous system is pulled into your preferred way of protection: flight, fight, fawn, or freeze. Simultaneously, your prefrontal cortex goes offline.
Your prefrontal cortex is responsible for decision-making, focus, emotion regulation, and planning. Daniel Siegel, MD (Harvard-trained psychiatrist, neuroscientist, and author) calls it “flipping your lid.”
Overthinking can also originate from your past experiences with unpredictability, expectations, deepest concerns and desires, or criticism. Or it can be a product of your level of intolerance of uncertainty or even the way you experience anxiety.
Personally, I believe that overthinking can be both a superpower and a draining force, depending on how it manifests in your psyche and affects your mental well-being.
Overthinking as a Superpower
You’re fully aware of how overthinking can zap your mental energy. Here are a few ways you can benefit:
• Weighing all your options makes you less likely to act impulsively, helping you make favorable decisions with little to no regret.
• Your ability for empathy is often next level. Because you look at all situations from every possible angle, you also have more grace and empathy for those around you.
• You’re often seen as reliable and detail-oriented. You’re the one who’s been told, “You’ve thought of everything.”
• Side note: You can also have all of these characteristics without being an overthinker or identifying as one.
If, however, overthinking is inconvenient, following are a few ways to reduce it.
Notice or Increase Awareness
This involves recognizing your unhelpful thought loops. If you can spot them, then you can begin to do something about them. This can be done in the moment or after the fact.
Thank Your Thoughts
I understand this might sound strange. Acknowledging your thoughts and all their hard work to keep you safe often decreases their hold over you – which could also translate into less overthinking.
Schedule Worry Time
If you’re going to worry, let’s do it with intention. First, pick a time of the day that you can consistently worry. Next, choose a location where you’re less likely to be disturbed. Then set your timer, watch, phone, or whatever for 10 minutes. Now, worry about all of the things. When your timer goes off, you can leave, but not a second earlier. If you find 10 minutes is too much, reduce the time the next day. Side note: It might be helpful to write down your worries and concerns throughout the day. Bring this with you to worry time.
Try a Positive Twist
Since you’re (over)thinking anyway, actively look for two or three exciting, joyful, helpful, or even creative things to think about. This is an exercise in inclusivity, adding helpful thoughts without banishing the unhelpful ones.
The More You Know
You can’t stop thinking. It’s what minds do. Recent research shows we have about 6,200 thoughts a day, and up to 95% of those thoughts are either the exact same thoughts or iterations of the thoughts we had yesterday. The problem isn’t your thoughts; it’s getting hooked by the unhelpful ones and replaying them over and over.
If your overthinking is causing you to lose sleep, increasing your anxiety or stress, creates an uncomfortable stuckness, or feels too difficult to manage on your own, it might be time to consider therapy. Otherwise, carry on with your creative overthinking self.